Chosen Paths

by Ellie N.

Prologue

From his birth, Death was a precocious child. He knew that normal children weren’t locked up in their rooms, that some cruel spinster of fate had dealt him a hand that he couldn’t beat.

 His uncle had been a vile man who sought to teach obedience in the way of a striking hand, who didn’t care and most certainly didn’t love. And when no one was there to save him, Death found that the only way was to save himself.

 People feared him afterwards. Called him twisted and names he couldn’t bear to think about. So much hate for a child who wanted freedom. He had felt so much guilt that he decided to punish himself. And so came his becoming of Death, this phantom who took souls away, who would be hated for an eternity and feared by all. This villain everyone had already claimed him as.

—

Clara could still feel the beer bottle wedged in her gut, the blood oozing from her middle, the feel of her father’s hands tightening around her throat. Another night of too many drinks, his hands spinning out of control, her body colliding with the wall. 

It was in the past now, a decision she had no power against. She would never see her father again, never know that pain again, and yet, a part of her still felt a tug. A tug that weighed on her heart, telling her her life was unfinished. That tug–the primary reason she hid behind this rock now. 

In this afterlife, she was being sent to move on. Death had decided for her, and a Phantom escort was sent to guide her to heaven.  But when that decision had been made, she felt powerless, and part of that powerlessness fueled her spontaneity to run. To escape from the hands of her Phantom escort and seek shelter wherever she could.

“Why did you run?” The boy’s voice rings from her right. Someone who, too, felt the need to escape from his determined fate. Clara didn’t know why he ran, just that when he saw her running he joined her.

“I want to go back to my life before. I died because I was not brave enough to do anything. If I accept my fate and live in this afterlife, I will forever feel cowardly.” Clara’s own curiosity seeped from her lips. “What about you? Why did you run?” 

A cry sounded behind the rock. A baby cradled in the arms of his own Phantom escort, its body being transported to the very gates Clara wanted to escape, where he would be sent to heaven. His decided destiny. His life over without ever being lived. 

The boy’s body stilled as he glanced at the baby, loosening after some self-assured confirmation. “I don’t need to go back like you do. I died saving my baby brother. All I need is confirmation that he’s alive. I’ll accept my fate as long as I know he’s safe. I tried asking my Phantom escort, but he refused to comment. I just want to know that he’s okay.” 

Clara nodded. He too needed closure.

 A strangled yell came from not too far away. Both of them peered beyond the rock. A girl– feet against cool pavement and pigtails slapping behind her–was being chased by a Phantom. Clara’s body moved on its own accord. She felt the need to save this girl who too might’ve wanted a choice. Who didn’t want fate decided for her. 

Darting out past the rock, she ignored the boy’s pleas to stay put. She caught up to the girl and tugged. She moved to return to the rock when suddenly a chilled presence caught her. Her own Phantom escort captured her arms. The little girl ran off, but Clara stood caught. 

“I will take you to Death once more. There he will decide what happens next.” As the Phantom stared forward, Clara’s gaze slid to the rock, to the figure peeking out, his hands shaking, eyes wide and teary. She felt a pang of guilt for leaving this boy, powerlessness again washing over her. 

Suddenly, her determination renewed. She would not be powerless anymore. She was determined to decide her own fate. 

Clara’s soul whirled as both her and the Phantom transported. There came a chilling presence, a figure of shadowy black encompassed in gloom. From an outward perspective it seemed as if there wasn’t any bit of light in his soul. As if he never had one at all.

  Before Death could utter a word, Clara spoke. “I do not accept my fate.” Death stared at her, entranced by her boldness. At this girl who stood fearless when all he’d ever been was feared. 

“My life would not have been worth living if I ended it unconcluded. I must go back. I died at the hands of my father because I lacked bravery. Give me a chance to right it. How can I go on if I know I could’ve lived– if not for a stupid tie.”

 Clara’s heart screamed at her. Liar. Calling that tie–that bond to her father–stupid, fractured a part of Clara’s already cracked heart. Even thinking about it, Clara hated that small part of herself still attached to that man. 

Death felt a tug of sympathy for this girl so akin to himself, to the man he once was. “I am aware of your situation. But if all hopes are to be granted–if anyone can go back–why should there be an afterlife? Why are you worth it? Worth the exception?” Clara felt her tongue-tied. 

“I promise, if you allow me to go back, I’ll dedicate my life to saving others– so nobody feels powerless again. Grant me this single wish and I’ll save lives, I’ll make it so that nobody in my situation ever regrets, that they’ll end their lives without resentment.”

Death felt a part of his soul ricochet. This girl who could allow others to escape twisted fates like his own. Who could help them seek freedom the right way. A girl who could’ve helped his younger self when he needed it most.

“I’ll allow it.” Clara exhaled a sigh of relief, though now came the hard part. As if sensing her apprehension, Death continued. “I decided you can live, but your promise– is far more important. I can grant you life again, but what you do with it is crucial. For yourself and the others you promise to save, be valiant, Clara.” He let the unspoken words die on his lips. 

Be better than I was. 

Clara nodded her head solemnly. As Death moved towards her, she halted. “There’s a boy who seeks closure, just like me. Can you allow him that? Tell him his little brother is safe?”

Death’s gaze turned watery and downcast. “I know the boy you speak of, but I cannot grant him your wish. He’ll find out soon enough.” Clara felt her heart squeeze in her chest. Stepping into the light, her soul whirled as Death transported her. 

– 

Clara’s head was filled with a dizzying sensation that only grew more intensely. Her father’s defeated figure the only image in her line of sight.

He seemed concerned, panicked and whispering repents that were much too late. In that moment Clara seemingly found courage she never had before. 

“You’re hurting me. Do you know that?” Her father stills, and for the first time in forever, there’s some semblance of the man she used to know. “I don’t like you anymore. I’m scared of you.” Clara stares him dead in the eye against the flurry of tears. He too has tears of his own, but like his apologies, they’re too late. “I don’t want these bruises anymore. I don’t want you anymore.” 

“I’m sorry. I-“ 

Clara stares back unflinching and something clicks in her father’s mind. The years and years of pain he’s wrought on this child of his, pain he can never make up for. Staring at her sickly figure–like an alarm sounded too late, snoozed over and over again until finally blaring–unable to be ignored any longer. 

Grabbing his phone from his pocket he dialed in a number, an assurance that he would never hurt his daughter again. He handed Clara the phone and basked in the guilt of his actions–though it would never be enough, nothing ever would. 

Three rings sounded as Clara’s eyes sealed shut. Silence emerged, and then, a woman’s voice rang. 

“911, what’s your emergency?” Clara’s grip tightened on the phone, her throat constricting. Doubt and frustration battled in Clara’s heart. 

Even now, I’m not brave enough. I can’t do it. 

But as soon as the thought comes, she thinks of her promise, of all the others in this similar situation, that would leave their lives unfinished. Those very lives she had promised to save.  

Say it. Tell her your truth. 

And with a shaky breath, for the first time in her life, Clara finally finds it in her to choose herself. 

About the Author 

Ellie is a 13-year-old from the Bay Area.  She has a fondness for traveling and spontaneous late-night car rides.